Sourdough Cont.

Norah's home for Christmas. 

So I made two loaves this time. 

She's been gone to college for the length of sourdough exploits. 

When she bit into a slice, she mumbled through a mouth full of bread, "This is mag-nif-fi-cent." 

Family Read-Alouds

Ever since Norah went to college, the quality of our family read aloud time has suffered. None of us can read aloud as well as she can though we try. Now she’s home again to read to us.

A Fitting Happiness

I just finished reading and thinking and writing on Plato's Republic for graduate school. 

In it, Socrates speaks of the true shepherd, the true guardian, the true king, etc. 

The true shepherd considers the nature of sheep and fits himself to the tasks that are required for sheep to thrive. 

So in a way, even though a shepherd is a master of sheep, a true shepherd is also a servant to sheep.

This is because a true shepherd must submit to all the realities that the task presents to him if he wishes to be to the real thing and to do the real job of shepherding. 

Contrast the true shepherd with, say, a money-making "shepherd" who reduces his work with his sheep to a money-making venture and only raises sheep to fatten them for market. 

That kind of "shepherd" probably won't do half the work a true shepherd is compelled to do. 

A true shepherd is obviously still making his livelihood off his sheep, but his profit is secondary to his primary purpose, which is caring for sheep in truth. 

And then Socrates goes on to assert that a true shepherd or guardian or king, etc. experiences a particular happiness bound up with the job they are doing. 

And a true shepherd's happiness is tied up in the how well he is shepherding and how well his sheep are doing under his care. 

His happiness is natural to his job, fitting for his job, and limited by the reality of his job within the real world. 

A shepherd doesn't get to experience the happiness of a guardian or a king.

The guardian and king would experience a different happiness. 

But if they were true guardians and kings, they also have to be servants to their task, doing what is best for the creatures or people under their care. 

Socrates's talk of this fitting happiness struck me like a bell, and it has resonated all through the Christmas season. 

Perhaps this is the reason some people never seem to be happy.

Maybe they are looking for an inappropriate or disproportionate happiness to the one nature is offering them.

Maybe they want a different happiness than the one their particular life and work can provide. 

Maybe they have never become true to the work they are doing, so therefore, they don't get to experience the fulfillment nature provides from that job well done. 

Perhaps this is also explains somewhat why those who are truly happy get to experience happiness. 

Natural happiness is always, only, ever experienced as a limited, particular, fitting happiness based in our specific reality. 

And as I have thought about the true shepherd, I find that the same thing that goes for shepherds goes for mothers. 

As a mother, I am master of my home. 

But in a real way, being a true mother means I am actually a servant to my home, bound to do what my particular family needs to thrive in reality. 

And part of my job as master and keeper of my home in this particular season is to make Christmas happen. 

At this point, I've done with all the decorating. 

I've finished the shopping and gift wrapping, so many hours of gift-wrapping.

I am planning some special cooking and baking, but that can wait. 

For now, I have some margin to my feet up and enjoy leisure and take some time to reflect on my tasks this time of year. 

And I reflect that Christmas is a lot of work for a mother. 

Each tradition, however small, represents time and energy, and it all adds up to so much labor.  

I don't think my family could possibly know how much goes into it all, because they aren't the ones responsible for doing it all. 

But they still notice it all, and it helps that they appreciate when all the little things they look forward to are done again this year just like the years before. 

So this year, as I was working, working, working at Christmas, I was just as aware as ever that Christmas is "all up to me."

But I did not feel the weight of that like I have in years past. 

I did not feel any resentment like I have in years past.  

This year, Socrates has been on my mind in the midst of all my Christmas labor.

His explanation of the true shepherd has given me some insight into the burden I am carrying to make Christmas happen. 

Therefore, this year, all the labor has felt more like a fitting privilege that goes with the reality of my motherhood more than some unnatural burden. 

In many ways, as a mom, I am the culture-maker and culture-keeper of our home. 

(In fact, culture-making and keeping might actually be the essential work of motherhood.) 

So the Christmas traditions are mine to steward as part of the work of being a true mom.  

So I have given myself over to the task and all it actually has been requiring of me in reality, and naturally, it gives me back the particular happiness that true a mother has in this season.  

That happiness that I will experience as they open the perfect present for them and cry out, "Oh, Mom! Thank you!" or that happiness when they bite into their favorite cookies: 

it is a fitting and a real happiness that goes hand in hand with my life's work. 

It's all I can reasonably ask for, and it's fitting, and I do find it deeply satisfying, indeed. 

I have not sought a different happiness than the one I have been given. 

The happiness of a mother at Christmas is mine, truly. 

And this because the work of a mother at Christmas has been mine in truth.  

First Big Snow of Winter 2025

We had our first big snow. 

And after more than twenty years here in the north, as I look outside or walk in the woods or drive by the pond, etc., I have to admit.

Winters are my favorite now. 

There's something about them that suits me and matches the quiet of my heart. 

Homeschool Community

For every picture I take of my girls with their friends, there's a group of moms behind the camera. 

And those women are my best friends. 

I'm grateful that I know and love the women who are raising my kids' best friends. 

And I'm grateful I get to know and love my kids' friends.

We all, kids and grown ups, get together and banter and laugh. 

And then we split into groups of grown ups and teens and banter and laugh with people in our age group. 

And then we come back together and banter and laugh.  

And then we all go home with our own kids and we banter and laugh in the car on the way home. 

I don't know how it is for women raising girls in a regular school setting. 

Do you get to know the parents of the kids your kids are friends with?

In a homeschool setting, we get to build an amazing community of interwoven generations and conversations and laughter. 

And memories. 

For every picture like this, I remember standing shoulder to shoulder with my dearest friends. 

Peace

Our peace lily, given to us by a friend when Dwayne's dad died, is blooming right now. 

It's loveliest in the morning sun. 

It reminds me of Dwayne's dad and my own.

Both have passed. 

Both put their faith is Christ and asked Him to save their souls.

So I have hope that I'll see them again, and that maybe, too, they can see me, and they know I am doing well and thinking of them when I see my peace lily in the morning sun.  

 

Dark Chocolate Covered Coffee Beans

Dwayne's boss gives the best gifts. 

He sends grapefruits and oranges from Florida every December. 

We all cheer! 

He also gives delicious chocolates. 

This year, around other chocolate goodness, he gave us a box of Bridgewater Dark Chocolate Covered Coffee Beans.

These are the most delicious candy I've ever tasted. 

My new favorite candy- hands down!