Walnut Hill Easter Run/ Walk 2014

I ran in the Walnut Hill Easter Run Walk today. 

Running this 5K was a very significant goal for me last year, but I wasn't sure I wanted to run it again this year.

However, I think I'll be asked to run at least a few miles outside during my upcoming Bodypump Initial Training in May, so I thought it might be a good idea to put myself under some pressure and see how well I can do.

And I think it was also a nice way to mark any improvement from last year. I haven't been running that much, so I didn't know what to expect. 

My official time was 28:37 today.  That means my time has improved almost ten minutes since last year! (Last year I ran it in 37:54.)   

This year, my oldest daughter did the fun kid's fun run, too.  The photo above shows us in front of the finish line.

How I Am Preparing for Bodypump Initial Training

"Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training..."  1 Corinthians 9:25

I have about a month before Bodypump Initial Training.

To prepare physically,  I am teaching my regular group classes and doing my regular workouts every week. This includes-

one 45 minute tabata bootcamp that really helps to condition my cardio/ respiratory capacity

an hour long cardio/ muscle class

a senior's muscle class

and an hour-long freestyle barbell class similar to Bodypump.  I plan to use my regular amount of weight on the bar.

I usually also take one hour-long step class once a week.

And I have been running 5K (a little over 3 miles) once every week to get ready for a race.

But it turns out this running is still going to serve me well, since what I have read online about the initial training says that we may be asked to go for a run during training, so it's a good thing I have been conditioning myself for that possibility.

I plan to add two things to this already pretty full list-

One, two, or even three official Bodypump classes every week, depending on how my body feels, with as much extra weight as I can handle during those classes.

I've heard the master trainer makes you load on extra weight, so I want to get used to how that feels, too.

and two extensive stretching sessions per week.

I just did Cathe's Yoga Relax DVD. It was uh-mazing! I almost fell asleep on my mat! 

I have been neglecting stretching like I know I should.

But with the extra weight training and anxiety, I think I really must be diligent to stretch so I can do my best to keep myself from getting injured and too uptight.

 Once before the training, I have considered doing my own Bodypump Bootcamp, something I've read they are doing during training.  I think I'll set a timer, load on heavier-than-usual weights and try and do the same exercise until the timer goes off.

I am scared of that Bootcamp, so I figure the best way to handle that is head on.  I think doing my own might help me get over it (a little).

Once I get my Bodypump release in the mail, I'll prepare mentally by doing the release at home with and without weights, again and again, so I can focus intensely and really learn it. (I bet I will skip some of the Bodypump classes to make this physically possible.)

At work, I have also been turning around, teaching while facing the people in my classes, mirroring them, etc.  So when I say "right," they go right, but I actually go left.  It's been tough to teach this way since our group fitness room is full of mirrors and I was trained to teach with my back to the class.  But I have to teach Bodypump facing the class, so I want to start getting used to that.
 
Of course, I am increasing my calories in proportion to the extra work I am doing. I'm still eating healthy, just giving myself more fuel. 

I always drink tons of water.  I have heard that helps with alleviating soreness.  That's what they say.

I am also getting to bed as soon as possible every night, usually between 9 and 10pm, so that I have a long block of several hours to sleep and let my body recover and rebuild. 

I usually visit the chiropractor at least once every other week and I just realized that I have a gift certificate for a massage that I think I am going to use in between now and training.

I'm taking my vitamins.

Oh, and prayer! Lots of prayer! 

To prepare myself spiritually,  I have been making a notebook with inspirational quotes in it.  I plan to take it with me to training and look through it if and when I need a mental, emotional, spiritual reset at any point.

But even if I'm too busy to stop and look at it during the training, just meditating on the words now is helping me stay motivated and keep the proper focus.

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

"The joy of the Lord is my strength."

"Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit," says the Lord.

And my favorite right now,

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize?  Run in such a way as to get the prize!"

I Signed Up For Bodypump Initial Training!

One of the group fitness classes I teach is a freestyle barbell class. "Freestyle" means I make up my own choreography, counts, pick my own music, etc.

I enjoy teaching that class so much. It's pretty much my favorite class to teach, though I do enjoy all my classes for various reasons.

I have also enjoyed every. single. one. of the official Bodypump workouts that I've ever done at home on Pump DVDs from Beachbody or at gyms that have the official Bodypump program.

Therefore, I am totally convinced I will enjoy teaching official Bodypump classes.

So I've signed up to take Les Mills Bodypump initial training in May of 2014.

I have also talked to a local gym that has the Les Mills Bodypump license and they are willing to consider working with me and giving me a shot to prove myself and teach Bodypump at their facility.

I am so very drawn to the excellence of Les Mills programming!

I think I will enjoy all the benefits and challenges of being part of their community of fitness instructors.

Benefits- I don't know what all the benefits will be, but I do look forward to two things- using their excellent music and their awesome choreography in the official Bodypump classes I teach. (Obviously, I can't use the music or choreography in my freestyle classes and I don't plan to.  Integrity is very important to me.)  

Challenges- Someone else is designing their super-challenging workouts, someone who can, apparently, do a lot more push ups and overhead presses than I can do! So I can't cheat and design a workout with only sixteen pushups because that's what I can do easily.  Instead, I have to deliver on every new release, trying to do the thirty-two or even more pushups, whatever is in that release, etc.

(When I do design my freestyle barbell classes, I really try not to design it so that it is easy for me.  I always try and make sure I am challenging myself and the people who come to my classes. But I digress...) 

I will definitely enjoy the physical challenge of having to try and master their awesome routines.

So, hopefully, I will be able to pass muster, get my Bodypump certification and earn a spot teaching authentic Bodypump classes at a local gym somewhere, sometime in the coming months.

If I do become a Bodypump instructor, I know that I can't use any of the Les Mills music or choreography in my freestyle classes like the barbell class I teach at my current gym that doesn't have a Les Mills license.

But I am confident that everything I learn from being a Les Mills instructor, if I pass and get to work as one, is going to make me even better at teaching my freestyle classes, too.

Now to prepare as well as possible for the training, I have twenty five days and counting...  

Note: You may be asking, "What's Bodypump?!"  Here's a short video, a "sizzler" of their latest release #89, that will give you glimpse of what Bodypump is like.  This is actually the release I will be tested on!

 

My Weight-Loss Journey

My weight-loss journey begins like many other weight-loss (or weight-gain) stories. I got pregnant with my first child and I put on a lot of weight.

This is a photo of my husband and I with our first daughter. She was already two, but I hadn't figured out how to lose the weight I put on during pregnancy.

But even though the weight started increasing with kids, I know that's not really where my story begins.  And that's not really where it begins for most people, I think.  My story started a long time before that, when I was a kid, eating Ramen noodles, canned ravioli, and going through the drive through for fast food several times a week, eating food because of how well it tasted, not how well it nourished me.

Not to disparage my parents because they don't deserve that. I have kids now and I am busy, so I know how difficult it is to prepare healthy foods and try and make them appealing for little people.  My two year old wants to live off graham crackers and milk. 

But I definitely carried the processed tastes I developed as a child into adulthood and I know now that it was only a matter of time before the consequences of eating such dead, non-nutritious, calorie-dense foods started presenting themselves. Other people deal with sickness because of their diet. I wasn't sick, but I just kept gaining weight. I couldn't get the weight off, no matter how much I tried.

I wasn't lazy.  I was always active, an overachiever in many ways.  I took my kids to the park. We hiked.  I have natural coordination, an outgoing personality, and teaching abilities, so I even got a group exercise certification through AFAA and taught fitness classes for a few years during this time of my life. I lost some weight doing that, somewhere between ten to twenty pounds, maybe going as low as 175 at one point. But I didn't change my diet.  I would leave work at the gym and go to lunch at Wendy's or Taco Bell because after all that exercise I was starving. And it's no surprise that with a diet like that, no matter how active I was, I remained overweight.   Once, when a person found out that I worked part-time as a fitness instructor, they asked, "Do you actually do the classes?"  That was a blow, needless to say.

 This photo was taken April of 2012. It shows me leading my oldest daughter and some friends through field day activities.

At this point, I got pregnant with a second child, delivered a healthy baby girl, recovered from the pregnancy and went back to teaching fitness classes.  But within months, I was injured at work because of over training (and lack of proper nutrition, I'm sure), tearing a muscle in my leg that required a cast, then a boot, and then a very long time to recover regular strength, balance, and coordination in my leg.  I also had a nagging pain in my navel that turned out to be a hernia that needed surgery.  Between the hernia and the injury to my leg and the weight, I was terrible physical shape for a thirty year old.  During those weeks that turned into months without exercise, I gained so much weight. But I was just focusing on what I felt was most important at the time. I was working hard on my family and my home, serving the people I love and doing the best I could to develop discipline in other areas, like childcare, housekeeping and cooking every meal at home. The meals I made at home weren't the healthy meals I cook now, but we did stop going out to eat so often at this point.

This is a more flattering photo taken on Easter 2010.  Even though I was teaching exercise classes all the time, this is as thin as I could ever manage, eating such unhealthy food. 

I tried other things to get the weight off during those years. I thought that other people had success with programs. I tried Weight Watchers and had some success, ten or fifteen pounds lost. Again, I never got past 175-180 pounds. But any weight loss was fleeting because I didn't change the kinds of foods I was eating and once I quit the program, the weight came right back.  I just did my best to manipulate the points system to have as much unhealthy, processed food as possible. And the program was so expensive, and the results weren't substantial enough, so I always ended up quitting. The basics about eating a diet of healthy foods still remained a mystery to me.

 I didn't know what I didn't know about food, so I just kept coming back to exercise thinking that if I exercised enough for a long enough time, I could lose the weight.  I decided to start training for a 5K. I went for a few runs and I was so out of shape, I felt hopeless.  I cried out to God.

My faith is a fundamental part of who I am and all that I do, so I often pray my frustrations and my goals. I did then, too.  God began to slowly change the way I thought about physical fitness.  I didn't realize it before, but I didn't really value my physical world and I think that was the root of why I had neglected my physical body.  I had always believed that I was a soul with a body and that the world of the supernatural was more important than this one, so I believe I subconsciously favored my soul and neglected to take care of my earthly body. I began to believe that it wasn't just vanity to put effort into training my physical body. My physical life and my spiritual life are actually connected.  Bible verses like "I beat my body and make it my slave so that I myself will not be disqualified for the (spiritual) prize." illustrated this truth to me. I had an incredibly spiritual experience with God after going for a run and I sensed that He really wanted to help me lose the weight.  I was thrilled. But as it often happens, within just a few days, something happened that would delay my plans and test my faith.  I started feeling off and come to find out, I was pregnant with my third child.

I wasn't disappointed over being pregnant. I was happy to be having another baby. But any serious plans to work on my body through exercise were going to have to wait till my body was my own again. My energy was totally sapped. It felt like I was sea-sick for months and months.  I couldn't drink water without throwing up.  High-fiber foods like fruits and vegetables also made me vomit.  But I could manage to eat pastas, cheeses, and meats.  So I did.  And since I was already so overweight when the third pregnancy began, I was in even worse shape as it progressed.  But I focused on getting through the pregnancy, having a healthy baby, nursing her, recovering, caring for my other two kids, and serving my family.

This photo was taken in May of 2012, weeks after my precious third daughter was born.

When the baby was about a year old and beginning to wean, I sensed it was time to try again.   But, by this time, I was convinced that my diet would be the key to lasting health.  I had read enough, seen enough evidence here and there, and had my own experience over the last few years to know that I wouldn't get healthy by exercising alone.  I had to figure out what to eat once and for all.  So I prayed about it and as I was listening to Dave Ramsey's radio show one day, he said, "If you want to win, surround yourselves with winners."  That gave me the idea to reach out to a particular friend who I knew to be healthy. She was thoughtful about her health and gracious and kind, so I felt comfortable telling her about my situation and asking for advice.

My friend's diet was what I would have called radical back then. She was one of those people who I labeled as a health nut.  She avoided toxins, ate organic meats, tons of vegetables, some of which I had never even heard of. She told me about the book The Maker's Diet and said it would give me some basic guidelines to go by.  I read it right away and what the author said about food sounded reasonable to me, even wise, so I decided to try applying the principals to my own diet. 

I was praying often during this period of time and I sensed that God wanted me to start applying wisdom to my food choices and practice self-discipline to get my physical appetites in check. I felt like a slave to sugar, processed foods, caffeine, etc. and I wanted, needed to free myself.  Like many Christians, I believe the Lord's Holy Spirit lives inside me now and compels me to act in certain ways. I felt compelled to change my eating habits.  And, for me, there would have been no peace in my spirit or mind if I had ignored the voice of the Lord, even over something as simple as my diet.  I knew I would have to force myself to swallow so many fresh greens and vegetables and keep eating them until I was done with every meal.  I ate vegetables before that, but only a few times a week.  I didn't relish them and I didn't have an appetite for as many of them as I knew I would need to start eating to help myself. 

I didn't know if I could do it. Physically, my body was so undisciplined and I craved unhealthy foods so strongly, I was very conscious of my weakness. So, for me, it was not only a physical struggle, but it felt like a momentous, spiritual battle as well. I had to apply spiritual force to win this battle.  I had to decide to submit every single meal, every single bite, to the healthy principles that I felt like my Lord was leading me to apply.

This photo was taken in November 2012.  This is the heaviest and most out of shape I had ever gotten, approximately 225 pounds.  

So with all my doubts and weakness, I began anyway.  In December 2012, only days before Christmas, I cleared my pantry of all our processed foods, made a healthy meal plan, and filled my cart with whole, organic produce. There wasn't even one box or can in my cart that first trip to the grocery store.  And I spent at least twice as much on groceries. Processed foods are much cheaper. But I made the sacrifice and did it anyway. 

After the first terrible week, I stopped craving sugar and caffeine. That was the biggest hurdle.  After another week, my friends started commenting about how bright my eyes were, that my skin was glowing, etc. My energy level had gone up and was staying constant, even between meals. I started losing weight almost immediately.

This was taken in February 2013.  It's hard to tell, but I had already lost twenty to thirty pounds since I started eating right a few months earlier in December.
  
Before, when I was eating a ton of processed foods, I would eat a meal and be hungry again within thirty minutes to an hour, so hungry that I'd often eat something again. But once I started eating whole, nutritious foods, I could go for hours and hours without eating and I had much more consistent, level energy. I know now that by giving up the processed carbohydrates and replacing those foods with densely nutritious, fresh vegetables, lean meats, and healthy fats, I was finally balancing my blood sugar and giving my poor, neglected body the nutrients it needed all along.  My body was healing itself and the weight was just falling off. I had to shop for new jeans every few months!  Praise God.

I took this photo because I was so thrilled that I was finally able to button a jean jacket that I had since before I had kids.  I hadn't been small enough to button it, even when I was teaching fitness classes.  At this point, I've actually had to give the jean jacket away because it is way too big!

After the first month or two of eating differently, I did decide to start exercising again.  I began training for a 5K again. I used the Couch to 5K app and we bought a treadmill because it was the middle of winter and I couldn't run outside.  In the afternoons, instead of relaxing and watching television, I put on my workout clothes and got to work.  I kept worship songs playing as I ran and I just prayed and prayed for strength to keep honoring the Lord and applying wisdom to my diet, my body, my exercise, my self image.  I worked through a lot of things mentally, spiritually, emotionally while I exercised and now I have fond memories of those times.

One of the songs that meant the most to me was "Fill Me Up" by the band Jesus Culture. The lyrics are a prayer to God, saying to Him, "You provide the fire. I'll provide the sacrifice.  You provide the Spirit. I will open up inside. Fill me up, God. Fill me up, God.  Fill me up, God. Fill me up."  It was the perfect song and prayer for what I was going through. I felt like I was offering my body as a living sacrifice, letting more and more of it literally burn away with the help of God's fire stocking me on in my spirit. And since I was giving up so much food, asking the Spirit to "fill me up" and satisfy me instead was also very appropriate. As I ran, I felt like my unhealthy body was finally beginning to catch up with my healthy spirit. My body and spirit were finally beginning to run together!  I ran my first 5K in April of 2013 and it was very satisfying and healing to finally accomplish that goal after all that time.   

Toward the end of my Couch to 5K training, I had decided that I couldn't focus on cardio forever.  I needed to build muscle by doing weight training, too. To do that at home, I ordered Les Mills Pump DVDs from a friend who is a Beachbody coach.  I had been to one Bodypump class while I was visiting a YMCA in Florida years before and I hadn't forgot how amazing it was, so I knew I'd enjoy the program at home.  Appropriately, when I pulled up to my house after running that first 5K, UPS had delivered my DVDs and I was able to start doing Pump at home right away.

This photo was taken after running my first 5K in April 2013.

I followed the Les Mills Pump training schedule that came with the DVDs religiously until it was done.  I increased my weights as quickly as I could and had to order more and still more.  And instead of walking for cardio like the schedule recommends, I just kept running on the treadmill.  When I had done the whole calendar of workouts, I ordered the cardio DVDs that go with them and started the cross-training hybrid calendar, doing that entire schedule a few times over.

By this time, I had decided to contact the Greater Waterbury YMCA, where I taught fitness classes years before.  I had rediscovered my love for group exercise through the Pump DVDs at home, I thought I'd like teaching fitness classes again, even if they weren't Bodypump classes.  The Pump DVDs had put me in the best shape of my life, so the Y welcomed me back and by the fall of 2013, I was once again certified to teach group fitness classes and teaching a few classes.  But this time, I was not just doing the job, I was also looking the part.

 I had gone from approximately 225 to 160 pounds, the goal weight I never really thought I would ever get to, in one year. I'd gone from being soft and out of shape to leading group fitness classes. With God, all things are possible.

This photo was taken in August 2013. I was teaching fitness classes again, this time doing the job and looking a little more like it.

I have continued eating healthy, losing even more weight (albeit more slowly), and working to build more and more muscle.  I am putting my best into my fitness classes and enjoying other workouts, too.  I feel as if the Lord had me lose so much weight not just so that I could enjoy the personal benefits of health, but that so I could fulfill what I didn't realize was a call on my life- to teach excellent group fitness classes, blessing the people who come to my classes with a excellent, uplifting workouts.

This photo was taken a few days ago after working at the Y. 

I'm still working to glorify God with and in this body, still hoping for even more improvement.  But I am thankful and I give Him all the glory for the changes He was brought about in my life on this weight-loss journey.

Miracles and The Black Stallion

I finished Miracles by C.S. Lewis late last night.

Finishing this book was a miracle in itself.

It was so difficult to understand in places.

I imagine that I will be able to come back to this book in the future and be more equal to it.

If I had to use an analogy, reading this book was like riding a stallion when I am really only ready for a healthy, full-sized mare-of-a-book.

But the things I did understand on this ride were glorious.

For instance, Lewis compares the bodies we will have in heaven to horses and our using them there to horsemanship.

This quote was especially meaningful to me because we've been listening to the audio of The Black Stallion by Walter Farley all week.

(The Lord speaks in coincidence.) 

If you know this book, you know that Farley doesn't romanticize horses and riding like other authors do.  The horse in his story, The Black, is such a wild, magnificent, powerful horse that he is also impossible for a human being to ride without risking his life.

Once The Black is let loose to run as nature allows him, the horse always goes so fast that any reigns cut deep into the boy-rider's hands, causing him to grasp the horse's mane for dear life sometime during every ride until the horse grows tired enough to slow down.  The boy usually finishes each ride with clumps of horse hair mixed with the blood and cuts on his hands.

You would think this story would cause me to fear horses and riding, but in fact, it compelled me to tell my husband just a few days ago, "You know, I'd really like to learn to run on horseback..."

So that's why this quote by Lewis struck me so.

About the bodies we will have in glory, Lewis says, "Who will trust me with a spiritual body if I cannot control even a physical one?  These small and perishable bodies have been given to us as ponies are given to schoolboys.  We must learn to manage: not that we may someday be free of horses altogether but that someday we may ride bare-back, confident and rejoicing, those greater mounts, those winged, shining, and world-shaking horses which perhaps even now expect us with impatience, pawing and snorting in the King's stables. Not that the gallop would be of any value unless it were a gallop with the King, but how else- since He has retained his own charger- should we accompany Him?

Jesus' physical body ascended into Heaven we know. And somehow, we will be there with Him with solid enough arms to embrace Him and solid enough legs to stand before Him.

I want to be ready to take the reigns of that glorious, heavenly body, equal the task of taking my first steps on Heaven's grass, my first stroll with Jesus.

We also know this life prepares us for the next somehow.  So I take the reigns of this humble life again.  It's just an old pony, but with it, the Lord teaching me to ride. No. Not just ride, The Lord will teach me to run! 

Future Glory

I'm reading Miracles by C.S. Lewis right now.

I'm also listening to a ton of Andrew Peterson.

Today, I found a beautiful connection between something Lewis says in his book and something Peterson sings in one of his songs.

A portion of Miracles by Lewis says,

"For God is not merely mending, not simply restoring a status quo.  Redeemed humanity is to be something more glorious than unfallen humanity would have been, more glorious than any unfallen race is (if at this moment the night sky conceals any such.)  The greater the sin, the greater the mercy: the deeper the death the brighter the rebirth.  And this super-added glory will, with true vicariousness, exalt all creatures and those who have never fallen will thus bless Adam's fall."
 
And as I was listening to Andrew Peterson's song, "Don't You Want to Thank Someone," this portion reminded me of what Lewis said above.

And when the world is new again
And the children of the King
Are ancient in their youth again
Maybe it's a better thing
A better thing
To be more than merely innocent
But to be broken then redeemed by love


You can listen to the entire song below. 



I am also reminded of the Japanese pottery called Kintsugi.  A pot that's been broken is mended with gold, making it even more beautiful than it was before. That's like us. 

Here's a picture of what I'm talking about.

 

Of course, Adam didn't have to sin.  But he did. So did we.  And God did something beautiful about it all. Everything He touches becomes beautiful, of course. 

Lewis says, "But once the Son of God, drawn hither not be our merits but by our unworthiness, has put on human nature, then our species (whatever it may have been before) does become in one sense the central fact in all Nature: our species, rising after its long descent, will drag all Nature up with it because in our species the Lord of nature is now included."

More than anything, these ideas cause me to hope in the future glory.  "Peering into the future, I see gleams of gold," as Lewis puts it.  I was glad to be alive before this, now I am ecstatic about my own existence.  God has, is, and will continue to do something beautiful.  I get to be a witness, more than that, a participant. What a privilege.

"...the glad Creator. He has become Himself incarnate, " says Lewis.

His condescension has made us great. Psalm 18:35

His glory is ours is His.

Amen.  







  

"These small perishable bodies we now have were given to use as ponies are given to schoolboys. We must learn to manage: not that we may be free of horses altogether but that some day we may ride bare-back, confident and rejoicing, those greater mounts, those winged, shining, and world-shaking horses which perhaps even now expect us with impatience, pawing and snorting in the King's stables. Not that the gallop would be of any value unless it were a gallop with the King; but how else-since He has retained His own charger-should we accompany Him?" -C.S.Lewis