Monday, August 31, 2009
After her last visit, my niece left her camera behind. The day after she left, I put her camera on the table by the door. A day after that, Dwayne said he'd take it to work and mail it to her from there. That effectively took Sarah's camera off my mental "to do" list.
But, that didn't stop me from noticing that Dwayne didn't do it either. He kept forgetting to take it to work and every morning, when I would straighten up the table by the door, I'd see the camera there and try and keep the things I was thinking about him from coming out from under my breath.
A few mornings ago, however, I was cleaning the table as usual. I moved the coupons to the edge, so I'd remember to take them to the Jeep when I went shopping. I moved my gardening gloves and shovel over so I'd grab them when I got home and weed a little before I got busy doing something inside. And, I noticed and straightened the AFAA papers that I needed to complete for my certification process.
That's it. That's all I noticed.
Fast forward an hour and a half. I check my email. I notice Dwayne has written me to tell me he has sent the camera to my niece.
That is when it hit me. I hadn't noticed the camera there when I cleaned, but I also hadn't noticed that it was gone, either. The fact that Dwayne had taken it to work completely escaped me.
At that moment, I realized how often I only notice the things he doesn't do.
I usually can't even begin to see where my husband is coming from when he complains that I only see the negative, like when I complain about the fact that he didn't cut the grass rather than realizing he didn't have time to cut it because he was helping me with the kids.
Now, if Dwayne only noticed when I didn't cook dinner or when I didn't clean the house or when I didn't stay on budget or when I didn't do laundry, I think I'd go crazy.
But, every now and then, something like this happens and I have a moment of clarity and I feel sorry for him because he has to live with me.
But, like I said, this only happens every now and then.